Freedom from limiting beliefs

I am fortunate. I am privileged. I am lucky.

I grew up in a loving family and I have always been loved unconditionally. I grew up in a wealthy country and I always had everything I needed. Whatever I did, whatever challenges I faced someone was always there to support me. All the options have always been right in front of my feet. I can decide on any career I want, go anywhere I like and be with whoever I love. I have the right and the power to make any decision concerning my life. I am not held back by anything but myself.

I am free and most likely so are you. The only thing that can hold you back is if you tether yourself to limiting beliefs. Do not convince yourself that you are not good enough, not capable or not worthy of something in life. Of course you are good enough! Maybe not right now, but you will be if you set your mind to it. Dare to dream big and go chase those dreams. Don’t hold yourself back it will only cause you misery. Every goal can be reached if you just break it down to small bits and take action one step at the time.

When I use the term limiting beliefs what I mean is beliefs that somehow prevents you from growing and pursuing your dreams. I learned about this in the INFJ Purpose blueprint course. One of my most dominant limiting beliefs is that I can not do anything that my parents will disapprove. Even though I moved away from home and I am taking care of myself without problems I need their approval for almost everything I do. I get scared if I do something they might not like and I feel guilty. subconsciously many of my decisions are based on: Would this make my parents proud? And I know it is a bit silly for a grown woman living by herself to worry about her parents thoughts on her. But that is my tether: My belief that I can do something that does not make my parents proud.

Now you might ask: How do I escape my limiting beliefs? First you need to recognize them. If you do not accept the fact that some belief of yours is in fact limiting you, then you will not be able to conquer it. Next step is to find proof that it isn’t true. Find examples of something happening to you despite that belief, something positive. A common limiting belief is the fear of rejection. You do not ask for what you want because you are afraid that you will get rejected. Look for situations in your life where you asked for something and did in fact get it. Even if it is small things. Then move to the bigger ones. Also recall situations where you did get rejected, but it wasn’t that bad. Again start with the small things. Maybe you asked to pay with your card but they said they only took cash. Was that the end of the word? Of course not, then you wouldn’t be here. You’ll start realising that your limiting belief is in fact not true at all. You can then challenge yourself to do these things that scare you and goes against that withering limiting belief. Of course it should be meaningful to you, not just disprove it. For example I would not do something just because I think my parents would dislike it, but I would do it because I believed it would make me happy no matter what my parents think.

You will find yourself relieved to get rid of these limiting beliefs and start building empowering beliefs instead. Limiting beliefs is no. 5 on the list of 15 things you should give up to be happy I like this list a lot and try my best to follow these 15 pieces of advise. I am more succesful in some areas that others. I few of them overlap a bit as well, but I believe it is just to make sure it covers it all. I find that whenever I am uncomfortable, restless, sad or angry it is due to me holding on to one of these things on the list that I should just let go (unless I’m sick and that is luckily rare). So unleash yourself from the tethers and live a happier and more fulfilling life.

via Daily Prompt: Tether

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Why do you think you can’t?

Yesterday I took the 2nd video lesson of my INFJ Purpose Blueprint course. This time I feel more exited, energized and enthusiastic about the exercise than I did with the last one. What I need was a mindset reset and that is exactly what this lesson was all about. My mindset is what is holding me back. Now I just have to identify, uproot and replace those limiting beliefs I have with something better. Well this is most likely not gonna happen overnight, but I can barely wait to get started. After the last lesson I really doubted that this course was the right for me at all and I didn’t think it would actually make that much a difference. That attitude has now been replaced with a much more hopeful and optimistic one.

Why do you think you can’t?

This question is what I now need to answer. When I know the answer I need  to convince myself that I am wrong and that I in fact can. Previously I have worked with this challenge and had positive result. This time it will however be more specific, more focused and more conscious. Let me give you some examples of what I have done and achieved even though I initially thought I couldn’t.

  • Move straight from my parents to a different country. I did. I packed, I left and now I live abroad. Sure it is only temporarily but that doesn’t change the fact that my parents live more than 500 miles away and here they don’t even speak my language
  • Get a fulltime job before graduating with a master degree. Even though it is temporary as a volunteer I do work full-time here. I just send the application and less than two weeks later I started. No qualifications need, just the time and the interest to do it.
  • Dance salsa. My friend was really skilled and elegant in this style and I thought I would never come anywhere close to that and dancing was probably not really my thing. I was super awkward, offbeat and hopelessly stiff in the beginning. Now I learned to relax more, feel the music od follow the leads. Still I am just enthusiastic amateur for social dancing, but at least I improved A LOT.
  • Make friends that last after geographical separation. I used to be shy and isolate myself most of the time. I didn’t get close to people. Now I have friends that live more than 300 miles away, but we still keep in touch.
  • Learn all the ropes. I am allowed and able to run all rope session. The training took me through step by step, I quickly got the hang of it. After that I added a few other qualifications as well and I run sessions in (almost) it all.

IMG_4724.jpgThere are other examples as well, but I think these are enough for now. Doing something you first thought wasn’t an option for you is all about having faith and leaping in to it. Take that one more step that scare you and then the magic happens. The sense of success and achievement is so satisfying. What have you done that you initially thought you couldn’t?

Let the purpose journey begin!

A few weeks ago I signed up for this course called the  INFJ Purpose Blueprint. It has now begun and I must admit my feelings towards it are still quite mixed. I’m exited, yet doubtful. I am determined, but also nervous. I want to find my purpose. I want to live a meaningful life and become the best edition of my self. My full potential is still to be unfolded and I want that to change. This process can not be rushed, but I can speed it up with focus, effort and honesty. Part of my process will be shared here on my blog.

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Taking notes

The course is built around the L.E.F.T acronym structure, which means: Looking in, Experimenting, Focused action and Time to Reflect. We start of in stage one: Looking in and this weeks lesson was exactly about that. For copyright reasons I cannot share the details, but I can tell you it’s not that easy. The questions they ask seem so simple, yet they are quite challenging for me to answer. There’s a lot of information and thoughts to digest tonight. I need some sleep before I dive to deep in to the focused work with this material I’ve now been presented for.

 

My friend Ashley is joining this course as well. Read her blog post about it here.